Celine's Laws[]
'Celine's Laws' are a series of three satirical principles about government and society articulated by Hagbard Celine, a fictional character in Illuminatus! Trilogy by Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shea. Celine, described as a gentleman anarchist, serves as a mouthpiece for Wilson's anarchist and libertarian critiques of authority. These laws are originally presented in Celine's in-universe manifesto, Never Whistle While You're Pissing, excerpts of which are included in the trilogy's appendix.
Celine asserts that these laws describe the systemic flaws inherent to hierarchical systems and human psychology. He claims they can predict the decline and fall of nations as universally as Newton’s laws describe motion.
The Laws[]
First Law: "National Security is the Chief Cause of National Insecurity" This law critiques the paradox of how governments' attempts to ensure security often create fear and insecurity. Celine explains that the creation of a secret police to guard against threats inevitably leads to internal corruption and paranoia. Each layer of security demands oversight, spiraling into an infinite regress of monitoring. The result is a society where citizens are more endangered by their own government than by any external threat.
Wilson illustrates this in Illuminatus! and beyond by discussing the Cold War paranoia of the Soviet Union, where poets and painters became targets of state suspicion, despite posing minimal real threat.
Second Law: "Accurate Communication is Possible Only in a Non-Punishing Situation" Sometimes phrased as "communication occurs only between equals," this law emphasizes that honest communication can only flourish when individuals do not fear punishment. In hierarchies, subordinates often lie or withhold information to protect their position, creating feedback loops that reinforce leaders' biases.
Wilson elaborates on this in Prometheus Rising through the example of J. Edgar Hoover's FBI. Agents exaggerated or fabricated evidence of communist conspiracies to appease Hoover, even as the agency ignored organized crime—because Hoover denied its existence. This demonstrates how hierarchies distort truth.
Third Law: "An Honest Politician is a National Calamity" Celine provocatively suggests that an honest politician—who sincerely seeks societal improvement through legislation—can be more damaging than a corrupt one. While corrupt politicians enrich themselves, honest politicians may introduce excessive laws, restricting individual freedoms. Celine argues that the proliferation of laws inevitably criminalizes ordinary citizens and fosters authoritarianism.
Wilson often connected this law to anarchist critiques of state authority, contrasting the unintended consequences of idealistic governance with the self-limiting greed of corrupt politicians.
Influence and Expansion in Other Works[]
Robert Anton Wilson explored these principles beyond Illuminatus!:
1. 'In Cosmic Trigger I: The Final Secret of the Illuminati': Wilson critiques centralized authority and how fear is manipulated for control, tying back to the First Law's critique of security-driven paranoia.
2. 'In The Illuminati Papers': The book includes an essay under Celine's name elaborating on the laws, particularly their implications for anarchist and libertarian philosophies.
3. 'In Prometheus Rising': While not explicitly referencing the laws, Wilson discusses similar themes, particularly how punitive systems distort communication and behavior.
Philosophical Context[]
Celine's Laws are both satirical and incisive critiques of hierarchical systems. They align with libertarian and anarchist critiques of state power, emphasizing decentralization and skepticism of authority. The First Law resonates with Orwellian fears of surveillance states, the Second with communication theories like those of Marshall McLuhan, and the Third with critiques of legislative overreach.
References[]
1. Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shea, Illuminatus! Trilogy (1975).
2. Robert Anton Wilson, Cosmic Trigger I: The Final Secret of the Illuminati (1977).
3. Robert Anton Wilson, The Illuminati Papers (1980).
4. Robert Anton Wilson, Prometheus Rising (1983).